Dear Taurus, Here is your horoscope for Tuesday, February 3:
You're not quite yourself today and that could mean that your friends are getting worried. Try to reassure them that it's just a short-lived phase, but if you've got to endure an intervention, so be it.

Er... my tummy is upset from all the crap I ate this weekend. I regret nothing! Nothing, I tell you!

( Cut for Weekend Twittering. )

An idea stolen from devilzfood, who amuses me no end.

Should I date him?
Episode I

( Cut to spare your brain, maybe )